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Thinking of starting a coaching business or looking for new ways to book clients? You're in the right place! You're listening to the Book Your Dream Clients Podcast with your host, Lindsay Maloney. Enjoy these bite-sized episodes, from one coach to another, to help you create and scale your business with simplicity. No hustle required.
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Monday Jun 20, 2022
How to Get Unstuck and Out of a Rut
Monday Jun 20, 2022
Monday Jun 20, 2022
Let’s talk about what to do when you feel like you’re stuck and in a rut. First of all, this happens to everybody, so don't feel like there's something wrong with you or that something's wrong with your business. It's okay to feel this way. Let's get that out of the way. It's okay to feel stuck. Stuck. I hear that word all of the time. In fact, it's probably used in almost every single one of my client applications, “I feel stuck. I need help getting unstuck.”
So, let's talk about it. What does it even mean? How do you diagnose it when you don't know the symptoms? When I feel like I'm stuck or in a rut, like I don't know what to do next and just go from task to task; whether it's in my business or out and about in the house, If I'm supposed to work on a project for my business, I’ll instead decide to organize something or I’ll decide to look up something that I don't need to know the answer to right away. Basically, I'll do something completely off task.
I know do these things because I'm avoiding something. It’s like I decide to stay in a little circle going nowhere and I choose to stay on the hamster wheel. Then at the end of the day, I feel stuck because I didn't go anywhere. Then rinse and repeat the next day.
Another symptom of being stuck and in a rut is you're not feeling like you want to do this anymore. You know you're supposed to, but you don't feel there's any motivation behind you anymore. You feel like everything on your task list is a chore that someone else assigned to you and you're neglecting it all. Or maybe you're even holding anger towards them. Thoughts are coming up in your mind like, “Why would you make me do this today? I don't want to do this!” When you're literally the person who put it all on your list… You're also looking at your goals for the year and feeling really negative about them. You don't even know how you're even going to accomplish them. What were you thinking? Can you relate?
There's a reason for all of these feelings. And guess what? There's no magic potion that’s going to help you either. There's no magical word or affirmation that's going to change everything for you. Period.
What you need to do first, is take action. Clear out the clutter. You know that Friends episode, the one with Monica and her secret closet? Where it’s full of junk and no one would expect it because her apartment always looks amazing and you would never expect to see that kind of mess?
I think that is how a lot of online coaches are. Everyone sees the highlight reels of their business. Their pretty posts on social media, their creative copy, all of that stuff. But nobody knows that what she really feels like is what that closet looks like.
It feels just fake after a while and you have to clean the closet out. Get all the clutter out. Journal how you're feeling. I'm a very positive person and I'm very grateful for everything. But when it’s time for me to clear the clutter out of my mind, it's really hard, because I feel like I'm being someone else. I feel like I'm losing or something. Like I'm not being myself. I feel vulnerable when I journal my negative thoughts, even though no one else is going to see them.
I like to be the strong person. I like to be the positive person. So showing that I feel defeated at the moment can be really difficult and it might be for you too, but this is a great exercise because it's needed. I think the things that feel the hardest for you or the things that you need to do the most.
So, journal it out. What's going on in there? What kind of clutter do you got in there? What is this mess all about? How did this even happen? How are you feeling? What are you mad about? You might be mad that you did something new in your business and you didn't get the results. You might be mad that no one is paying attention to anything you do online. You might be mad that you're not seeing any fruit from your labor.
There are a lot of reasons that we can feel frustrated in growing our business every day, but there are a lot of reasons to feel really good about all the things you've done since the day you thought of starting a business. So get all those negative thoughts out, get them on paper. And if you have to read them out loud, read them aloud to yourself and it will almost solidify their meaning.
It's okay to feel this way. Tell yourself that you're really grateful that you had the courage to just let it all out.
If you watched my last video on how to take back your schedule, you heard that I canceled a lot of podcast interviews. I took back my schedule. I was cleaning out something that wasn't working for me anymore and while it was really hard for me to let go of, boy that cleared out many shelves in my closet.
So, what are you clinging to and what do you need to let go of in order to move forward? It's almost like we’re traveling on this hike, that's really difficult and you're carrying a lot of things that you don't even need to bring. So much weight and hardship that you don't need to bring with you.
What if you just set it on the side of the road and lightened your load a little bit? Don’t cling to things that aren't serving you anymore. Make a change. What do you need to do to kind of freshen up?
What do you do after you’ve gotten rid of the clutter and chaos? You need to put it all the good stuff back in. Feel free to switch it up a little bit. Don't put things back where they were. Change it up.
Things that I like to do that kind of jazz up my day, and mind you I'm very simple minded here and I’m not going to tell you to go on a vacation or go to the spa for a day. I don't find join any of that. I find joy by shaking things up in my day. Like cleaning off my desk, cleaning up my office, or maybe even switching up my office.
When I feel like my family is in a funk, I'll do something like rearrange the living room or something similar and it changes everyone’s attitude towards everything.
Simple little things. It doesn't need to be this big thing. I think the reason why we don't change stuff is because we think it needs to be a big deal and it doesn't. The simplest things can take you out of your rut and you don't even realize it.
It doesn't all have to be office related. Do something around the house, Do something besides work. There are other parts of your life that might be affecting how you feel in your business. So, take a look at those things too. Get a bird's eye view and look at your whole day because I’m sure you're not working on your business 24 hours a day.
What else is going on that makes you feel like you're in a rut? Take care of all the facets of our life, all the facets of our day. You wear lots of hats. Don't just blame everything on your business. There are other parts of your life that might feel like it needs a little bit of TLC. And again, it's okay to feel this way.
It's going to happen over and over again. And that's okay because we know that we're on the verge of something good.
My last tip for you is the most important. I look at hard times in my business differently. Instead of saying, “I'm in a funk. I'm stuck. I'm this I'm that..” All negative, negative, negative, negative. What about this instead? What about saying to yourself, “When I feel this way, that means something good is about to happen.”
Something good is about to happen. If you have a day where nothing seems to go right, tell yourself something good is about to happen.
Something good is about to happen.
Say it over and over again, because something good is about to happen. I look at those moments as big signs, that, you guessed it, something good is about to happen. And all I have to do is make it through this.
I can do this.
You're never given something that you can handle. And sometimes you're handed things that are really hard. I get that, but something good is about to happen for you. I promise.
Just keep telling yourself that. Do these exercises. They will help you. And remember if you need help, there are a lot of people you can talk to. You can get guidance from books, research online, experts to learn from, or you can send me a message. I'd be happy to talk to you.
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